Happy Enough to WithStand the Onslaught

5-30-12

This is dangerous.  Jack in other room.  Sybil across from me.  Just have to say – long night, but this mornig, FB hung out with me fo a while.  I was talking to him instead of working out, which makes him very special.  Never did it for SM.  Then, he was getting on the treadmill, so he said, get on.  He said, “wow, it goes by fast when you are talking to someone you like.”  I said, ” who is that?”   He said, “you.”

So, I’ll take it.  I like that he likes me.  We treadmilled and I knew I was missing the planking, but I said to myself, I am not going to give up this time.  We were talking about kids, and he wanted to know where I went to college.  I told him and he said, “I never met anyone who went to an Ivy League School.”

Then, he was going to the back and he kind of said come on so I was following him.  I told him I should be wearing a kimono and shuffling my feet.  I am kind of embarassed because I was following him and asked what was next and he said, “there’s your group.”  Oops.  So I joined them late.  I didn’t care.  One of the girls I think likes him and I think she was giving me the hairy eye ball.  Oh well.  She has a flat ass and he likes a round one.

When I was stretching he came over right next to me even though there was barely room.  We continued to talk and then walked out together.  I hope DH and SM were watching!!!!!!!

So, it has kept me going through the day.  Jack had a lot to say on our ride to New York.  He gets to say whatever he wants like whatever he says or dies I am a pain in the ass basically.  If I say anything, he throws it in my face and designs our future around it.

I don’t fucking give a shit.  I have a good time when I am NOT talking to him.  I am fun and alive and nice and have a good time when I am NOT with him.  Please pray for me in Jamaica.  We will either come back divorced or happy.  I don’t know which I want.  I just realize that I have fun without him.  BUT, I do like a designated driver but I would probably be better off if I didn’t have one.  Either that or arrested.

I just can’t stop thinking about FB.  Who knows?  If I really got to know him in real life I might not like him.  BUT, what I like is that he is a MAN, has a JOB THAT PAYS MONEY, is so fucking fit and has a GREAT ASS!!!  AND, acts interested in what I say (some of the time).  He smiles when he sees me.  I loved today – even though I was missing planking, I figured I wasn’t going to leave him.   So the fuck what?

Anyway, time for bed.  He said he would see me tomorrow so I have to get there early.  I hope he is there on the early shift.

Thanks for listening.

Remind me to tell you about Melanie, my WW leader.