Quiet – Feeling Peaceful

29 Mar

Really?  Me?  Nothing to be messed up about?  Strange…..

Ok, I’ll find something.  I finished my ten months of relationship coaching today.  And, an amazing thing…..I don’t think I had one date in that whole time.

But what I found was better…….me.

I wanted to accept myself as is……and I finally think I have.

I am fine alone in my beach front cottage.

I am fine having gained a couple of pounds.

I am fine NOT having a man.

I no longer need to convince my ex to change his mind – that is a total miracle.  I finally figured out that I needed him to change his mind about me so I could matter.  Well, why would I let someone else determine if I matter.  How ridiculous!!!!  It was very freeing to see that.

I am (still) giving up my story that relationships start out great but then the guy will suddenly shut me out/dismiss me/make me wrong.  That one still needs a little work so I don’t keep repeating it.

I can speak up now.  Even though I’m scared, I can do it.  And I have.

I can embrace my fear like an old friend.  Instead of being afraid of fear, I can just bring it with me.  Instead of letting it paralyze me, I can take actions anyway.   That is really huge.  I have pretended I have been looking for a relationship, but really, I was relieved to not run the risk of being hurt again.  I am now ready to play and be in action.

I was making a little lie wrong from when I was young.  I then attracted liars.  I have accepted it and me and I am no longer a clearing for dishonest people.  Miracle.

I am happy and at peace.  A major miracle for me.

And, I am still creating a powerful, passionate partnership with a wonderful man.  But I no longer NEED to have one to be ok.  I am patient and waiting for an extraordinary man who is also looking for me.  I don’t have anything to prove.  I am just looking to fulfill my dream.

And, I hired my coach again.  Because I can trust her to make sure I don’t settle, pretend, put up with, or give up.  She is a stand for me to have the life and relationship that inspires me.  And, it’s an investment in myself and my dreams.

And, I am looking forward to this exciting adventure!!!  GAME ON!!!!!




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